Behind those walls
by Raelenee
Summary: What happens when Megan doesn't have her walls raised a late night in her office and Tommy comes by? I'm not so good with summaries so yeah... My first story :)
1. Piercing eyes

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline

**A/N:** So, I wanted to try to write about a different Megan. I wanted to capture that moment when her walls aren't raised and that she deep inside still likes Tommy, but doesn't want to show it (the mixed feelings)

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**Chapter 1: Piercing eyes**

Megan sat at her desk in her office going through the blood results from their latest victim. It was late, almost 11 pm, but somehow she didn't want to go home. She glanced out the window, admiring the city at night. It was so much more beautiful when the moon was high on the sky than when the sun shined, it struck her every time and she wondered if she would ever get used to it. She turned her full attention to the window and got lost in her thoughts, her index finger playing with a red curl.

A light knock on her door made her jump, her gaze shooting to the doors direction. Curtis stood in the doorway ready to go home.

"Just wanted to say goodnight" he said and waved a little.

"Night" Megan said before turning her attention to the window again. Curtis shook his head at her. She shouldn't be here this late, she should be at home, he thought as he left the building.

Megan sat like that for a while, mentally going through today's autopsy. There was something that wasn't right, she just couldn't figure out what it was. Soon her thoughts drifted away from work to Tommy, the fact that he was working with her irritated her but at the same time she liked to have him close. She thought about maybe someday being able to forgive him. She closed her eyes for a second and opened them again. No, she was sure she wouldn't be able to forgive him, ever. Not after what he did to her. Her mind drifted off to all the good moments they had had, all the giggles he had made escape her lips. The loving and warm expression in his eyes that was just for her, when he looked at her. Megan knew that he sometimes still gave her that look when he saw her. It melted her to see that he still had so much love for her, and at those rare moments when Megan's walls threatened to fall or did fall, she had no defenses, if he got too close to her she was sure she wouldn't be able to stop herself.

Megan heard a light knock on her door again, but didn't bother looking away from the window this time.

"Forgot something?" She asked thinking it was Curtis.

"Not really" a familiar voice said. He had stood there a little moment before he knocked on the door just taking her in; clearly he had interrupted her daydream. Megan looked away from the window and met ice blue eyes.

"Tommy." She said surprised. Tommy noticed that he had caught her off guard, given by her surprised expression, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips. "What are you doing here?" She asked as he took a step into her office. He had black pants, a black jacket and a light blue shirt on, his eyes a warm expression that she knew all too well. Megan tried to collect herself, raise her walls, but she found it impossible with his gaze on her, that gaze that melted her, drove her crazy.

"Just wanted to see if you still were here." He smirked "Its 12:15 am after all" he said and took another step closer to her desk as Megan stood up. _What? It was 11 pm a few seconds ago,_ she thought. She must have had daydreamed longer than she thought.

"Really, then I better get going" But she didn't make any efforts in packing her things so that she could leave. She just stood behind her desk, watching him. He thought she looked so… pure without her walls raised, so much like the Megan he had been so close to years ago. The happy, trusting Megan that loved _him_.

"You look nice" He said calmly nodding at the green blouse she was wearing. Megan looked down at her clothes as if she had forgotten what she was wearing, not quite sure what to do or what to say.

"Thank you" She decided was the best answer.

"No sarcastic answer? Wow I'm chocked!" He smiled at her making her giggle. It was a long time since he had made her giggle like that. The giggle that was pure amusement and happiness. It suited her so well he thought.

"No not this time" _Not really a typical Megan Hunt answer either,_ he thought. As she looked straight into his blue eyes Megan noticed that something in his gaze changed. She couldn't quite put her finger on what it was. She tilted her head a little to the left, hazel eyes studying him as her brain worked to figure out what he was doing here. _Shouldn't he be at home sleeping? Did he just come to my office to see if I was here? That makes no sense, maybe he couldn't sleep?_ Megan thought.

Tommy walked over to her, stopping in front of her desk, daring her to make a move. His eyes on her that way made her blush a little, she bit her lower lip but couldn't look away. He hadn't even said a word, yet she understood the meaning of his gaze. He was challenging her, and she couldn't say no.

Without thinking she walked around the desk in his direction. Something in the way she moved her body, in soft and fluid movements, almost as she was dancing, made him realize how much he had missed it, how much he had missed her.

Megan stopped barely a feet away from him, giving him a look that said _what's next?_ He smirked at her move and took a small step away from her, waiting to see if she would follow. The look he was giving her made a thrill of excitement run along her spine. Megan surprised herself by liking the feeling. She took a step in his direction standing closer to him than before. He could smell her sweet perfume in the air around her. If he leaned a little closer the gap between them would close. It would be so easy; she wouldn't be able to resist the desire and temptation. But he wanted to do this the right way, not create something from the heat of the moment that she definitely would regret later.

"Megan…" Tommy said, his voice low and husky, saying her name in that special way, the way she loved, as he took her hands in his. The sudden contact made her jump a little, but she didn't try to get him to let go. She liked the closeness and warmth he was generating. "I'm-" he started but got cut off by a phone ringing. Megan let go of his hands and reached for her phone on the desk.

"Megan Hunt" she answered, pressing the phone to her ear.

"Sorry, wrong number." The person on the other line said and hung up. Megan turned back to Tommy again, phone still in her hand, pressed against her ear. The call had made her realize what was happening, it had snapped her out of his spell and back to reality. She slowly let her hand fall to her side after placing her phone back on the desk. Tommy noticed that something in her eyes had changed, her walls were up again.

"Megan-" he begun but she cut him off.

"Just go." She said coldly, angry at how far she had let the whole thing go and the fact that he still could make her forget about reality just by looking at her in that special way with his loving blue eyes that tore apart her walls. He tried to protest but she hushed him and pointed at the door. He looked at her one last time before he walked out of her office, closing the door behind him. It was like closing the door to the Megan he fought to get close to every day, the Megan that still loved him. He had been so close, closer than ever to get through to her. Getting her to realize that they belonged together and how much he had changed of love for her.

When Megan saw the elevator doors close behind him she breathed out and sat down on the edge of her desk. Her hands cupped her face and she asked herself what that was. _What had just happened?_ But she couldn't come up with a good answer, because deep down she knew that it wasn't just Tommy and his piercing eyes that had made her react like she did, it had also been a part of her, a part she had tried to hide and forget about that had had something to with it.

So she began to pack her stuff down in her bag, leaving her office with her mind full of questions.

_What if that phone hadn't ringed? How far would I've gone? Would I have been able to stop, or would I just stay in his spell, his blue eyes looking straight past my walls?_

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Okay, that was it. I don't know if I'll continue with the story, we'll see how it goes.

Constructive criticism and reviews are always welcome.

_**- Rae**_


	2. Dancing lightning

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline.

**A/N: **Thank you for your beautiful reviews! I actually didn't expect people to like the story, but this just proves that you never know for sure.

I'm really not good with uploading and posting things(chapters in this case) but I've had some trouble knowing where and how to continue the story. Mostly because I just wrote something and posted it, not using any synopsis(which can ease very much).  
Anyways, here is the next chapter!

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**Chapter 2: Dancing lightning**

Tommy exited the elevator on the garage floor and walked to his car with heavy steps. Digging in his pants pockets for the keys he locked up the car, stepped inside and sat down on the black leather seat. Closing the door with a bang he took a deep breath. The air in the car felt sultry and dry so he rolled down the windscreen on the driver's side. Taking the steering wheel in a steady grip he took another deep breath.

"What have I done?" he asked himself. "Did I screw up everything again?" It felt like his heart would jump out of his chest, so he tried to focus on the gray wall in front of him.

As he stared out of the car's windshield he thought about what had happened just seconds ago. He had just left Megan's office, leaving her there, confused and angry. There hadn't been a good way to approach her without scaring her away the next second. The more he thought about it the more it felt like he had just done something without thinking of the consequences. Like he had jumped of an airplane and hoped for the best. When you were around Megan, you couldn't just act haphazardly, especially if she didn't trust you. You had to think three steps ahead, like chess. Acting without thinking would make you lose. He had no idea why he had decided to drive to her office almost an hour ago. Maybe he just needed to see her, her hazel eyes that always had a brightness in them, her red hair that looked like fire when the sun shined on it, her breathtaking smile. He didn't know, the only thing he was sure about was that he had ended up standing outside her office watching her before he knocked on the glass door.

Today he had managed to get passed her shell. Her hazel eyes had smiled at him in that teasing way he missed so much and he had made her giggle, the sound that was pure amusement and happiness, the sound that made him smile. It had almost felt like old times. She had danced past her desk to be close to him. And then he had moved away from her, just to feel warmth in his chest when she followed, when she took a step closer to him. He had taken her hands in his and she hadn't tried to pull away, instead just willingly accepted the affection and closeness. It had been so hard to resist the urge to kiss her right there and then, she had been breathtaking at that moment and it would have been so easy to just lean forward and kiss her. Tommy was positive she wouldn't pull away, but instead just accept the kiss, maybe want more. But then he knew that the second he would pull away she would regret it, because reality would come crashing down at her.

He knew it all along, deep down he did. But he had decided to ignore that and hope for the best, trust his gut. He already knew how the whole thing would end before he started it, yet her reaction when she had put the phone down, told him to leave and pointed at the door had made feel so frustrated, sad and confused. Why was she being so hard on him, refusing to let him in? He knew the answer to the question, she didn't trust him. He had really tried to do things right, try to show her that he still cared, but that hadn't helped. He had gotten too close too fast, and then you got pushed away again. _Of course she would demand me to leave_, he thought bitterly.

A sudden ping from the elevator broke his chain of thoughts. Looking towards the elevator doors as they slowly opened he saw a beautiful woman with a green blouse and flaming red hair step out. With her black coat and purple purse in her hand she slowly walked over to her car. Her eyes had a daze in them as if she was thinking, lost in another world. Her steps were slow and a little unsteady. The special rhythm and speed of her heels clicking against the cement wasn't there, instead the sound was replaced by uneven clicking that echoed in the garage.

Megan stopped when she reached her car and looked for the keys in her purse. Finding the keys, she locked up the car and stepped in, slamming the door shut. Taking a deep breath she stuck the key in the ignition and started the car.

Tommy watched as she drove away, out on the streets. He waited a few minutes before he started his own car and drove out of the underground garage. When he got out it was raining. Heavy rain drops fell on the windshield. He quickly rolled up the side window and tried to focus on the road. The streetlights gave the road an orangish light and lit up every raindrop that fell from the sky.

His mind drifted off to Megan, how out of character she had been in the underground parking lot, just dreaming, like she was in another world. He had probably given her a lot to think of. The realization made him feel more frustrated, but really what could he had expected? Megan asking him to continue what he was about to say? Tell him she still had feelings for him? Kiss him? Declare her love? The thoughts made him laugh at himself. _Of course_ she wouldn't do that. Sometimes he wondered how he even managed to be a cop if he was that naive. Frustrated he hit the steering wheel with his palms, making the car honk.

He couldn't find a solution to the problem. Tommy knew that he had approached her too fast, even if he didn't feel that way he knew she did, because trust took years to build, especially when a person trusted you and you broke the confidence. The question was what he would do next. Megan would just focus on work; everything she would say to him would be facts and conclusions, pretend like she hadn't been in her office that night.

Otherwise she would be ice cold towards him, avoid talking to him. Change the subject when things got too personally. Shut him out, cut him out of conversations and jump into another pretending like she was _very_ busy so that he wouldn't be able to talk to her. It would be like a quiet _I don't want to hear what you have to say_. She would avoid being alone with him, slam the door in his face, not hold the elevator. She would do anything to not have to take _the_ discussion about what had happened that night in her office. It would be just like old times, when she had refused to forgive him. But this time it was because she wasn't sure where she had herself, why she had reacted like she had, and not being in control was the thing that scared her the most.

Maybe the best thing was to just let it, let her go? Give up on them getting back together, just accepting the fact that he had had one chance and blown it. It seemed like the best thing to do, maybe it really was what he was supposed to do. But he knew he wouldn't be able to do that. How could he? There just was something about her, the way her eyes used to smile at him, her beautiful hazel eyes with a sparkle in them. How she used to give him looks that expressed and informed him of things in a way words never could. How he could look her straight in the gaze, and know exactly how and what she was feeling. Her eyes showed her every emotion; you just had to know how to read them. The red hair that framed her face, how it looked like fire sometimes. The breathtaking look of her playing with a red hair tress and smiling at him. That beautiful smile on her lips when he said something funny, the giggles that escaped her. But most of all, the expression that meant _I love you_. The expression that no other woman had managed to give him.

A thunder on the sky broke his chain of thoughts and he realized that he had parked in front of his apartment. It was still raining when he opened the door so he quickly locked the car and ran to the small lobby. Well inside he walked to the elevator but saw a sign that informed the residents that the elevator was broken. Sighing Tommy opened the door to the left of the elevator to the staircases. Taking two steps at the time, it felt like he made it to his floor in a matter of seconds. As he walked down the hallway to his apartment he thought about his conclusions in the car. Maybe Megan wasn't meant to be his? Locking up the door, he stepped in but didn't turn on the lights.

Tommy took of his shoes and jacket and walked over to the fridge in the small kitchen. The fridges light lit up the dark apartment and revealed that the shelves were almost empty so he would have to go do some grocery shopping tomorrow. Taking out a bottle of water and closing the fridge, leaving the room in complete darkness again, he walked over the wood floor to his bedroom and placed the bottle of water on the nightstand to the right. He started to unbutton his light blue shirt as he looked out of the window and saw lightning dance across the sky, leaving dark clouds behind. Like their relationship, you never knew where you would end up, you just knew that you had to try and follow every turn and not get left behind in the dark. Like a dance where you would try to follow the other person's steps and rhythm.

Taking off his shirt and sitting down on the edge of the bed he opened the bottle and took a deep gulp. As he looked out of the window again he thought about how clear this night had been a few hours ago and how chaotic it was now. Exactly how things had been between him and Megan not so long ago. There was a tension between them but that was all it was, nothing more nothing less, and now? He had no idea how thing were between them now.

He had acted first and thought later. Putting down the bottle on the nightstand again he sighed. Sleep was out of question since his mind wouldn't let him drift off to the land of dreams where everything was easy and _not_ like reality, where you knew that you would wake up eventually. He wished this was just a dream and that he would wake up any second with the relief of that everything was okay, that he hadn't made a mess off everything. But he knew it wasn't a dream, this was too real, it felt too real to just be imagination.

As Tommy closed his eyes and lay down on the covers with his hands under his head, he thought about tomorrow. It was weird how he wanted this night to end so badly but never wanted tomorrow to start. He needed to talk to her, but knew that it probably wouldn't be easy. Nothing was easy when you had an angry and confused Megan to deal with, he knew that from experience. But he just had to sort things out between them, find out where they stood after tonight.

"We need to talk." He said out loud, tasting the same words he would say to her in a few hours.

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And now that you have read through that, as i said in the beginning, I've tried to write a synopsis and I now have two alternatives, after the next chapter(that hasn't been written yet, but will be soon). I either go with the short version that is about three more chapters (six in total, maybe seven) or i go with the second alternative that is much longer and a lot off unclear feelings and twists. I don't know yet so tell me which alternative you would prefer. And if you got any ideas, feel free to share them.

Constructive criticism and reviews are always welcome.

That would be all.

_**-Rae**_


	3. Nightcap

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline.

**A/N: **Once again thank you for your reviews, they are very appreciated!

I want to thank **niagaraweasel **for giving me her thoughts and for correcting my errors, so thank you very much!

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**Chapter 3: Nightcap**

Megan entered the elevator and pressed the garage button. Turning towards the slowly closing doors, she let out a breath. She felt irritated and angry. Why did Tommy have to complicate everything for her? Showing up at her office this late, trying to achieve what? Closing her eyes she exhaled deeply. Couldn't he just leave her alone? Megan opened her eyes again and focused on the polished metal doors in front of her.

As soon as she had heard his voice in that alley, Megan had known things would get complicated; they always did if he was involved. Even though she had tried to make it clear she didn't want anything to do with him, here she was, upset and confused, all because of him. Her eyes lost focus as memories from the alley filled her mind. She remembered the day very vividly.

_She was examining the body, explaining to Detective Lucas, that they were just wasting their time, that the guy drank himself to death._

_"That's what we figured, but I thought we wait for the M.E." A very familiar voice she didn't thought she would ever hear again in a million years, answered her, breaking her chain of thoughts, leaving her brain completely blank. At first Megan thought she had heard wrong, it couldn't be _him_. He couldn't be here in Philly; maybe she had just imagined it. But then again, the voice had sound so real, it had sounded just like she remembered it, deep and with a teasing tone. The last time she had heard that voice had been more than twenty years ago, right before she left NY. As she slowly turned around her heart skipped a beat when his ice blue eyes met hers. Those eyes with a beautiful pattern on the irises, with corners that were a tone darker than the rest of the irises, the small, almost imperceptible dark blue spot on his left eye, like a little hole. It felt like she had moved back in time, slowly memories started to rise to the surface. He smirked at her shocked expression._

_"Adam say hello to Dr. Megan Hunt." He said in a calm tone that irritated her. How could he be so calm and just show up here and act like they had seen each other yesterday? She barely registered the detective saying hello. Her brain was working at full speed, trying to figure out what he was doing here._

_"Tommy." She said, as if she had to convince herself that the man standing in front of her was in fact Tommy. The same Tommy she had known in NY, the Tommy she had loved blindly, but also the Tommy that had broken her heart. Left it in pieces for her to pick up._

_"Megan." He replied in the same tone, teasing her. She heard the young detective ask something, but couldn't make out what it was. Her eyes were glued to Tommy's ice blue ones. Taking off her latex gloves and throwing them away, she grabbed his collar as her eyes narrowed his. Trying to put on a fake smile as she was dragging him further into the alley she felt the anger grow within her._

_"You have five seconds to tell me what you are doing here." Megan said in a harsh voice the smile gone. The last thing she wanted was to have him here; knowing him right it would only lead to complications._

_"Well, I did my twenty years in New York. I needed a change of scenery." He said and turned to look at her. "You always told me how great it was here." He continued with a smile._

_"So it's just a coincidence you are here, you just happened to get this detail?" She asked, her voice dripping with venom._

_"No, there was an opening, I took it." He responded and gave her a look she knew well._

_"It's never gonna work." She stated as she studied his facial features. He looked just like she remembered him, maybe a few more wrinkles but he still had those piercing blue eyes with an alert expression, the same haircut and that small smirk._

_"Why, we're both adults." He responded as if it was the most logical thing in the world. She laughed at his statement, mocking him._

_"No, that's the problem Tommy, you were never an adult." She saw it in his eyes that her words stung. "You actually thought this was a good idea?" Her voice making it clear that she thought it wasn't._

_"I didn't say it was a good idea. I did it anyway." He responded a small smirk playing on his lips again._

_"Whatever you thought was gonna happen between us" she said in a calm voice. "It's not" she whispered._

_"I didn't think anything was gonna happen between us." He started and took a short moment of silence before he continued. "Today."_

A ping from the elevator brought her back to reality, blinking a few times to regain focus she slowly walked out of the elevator and made her way to her car. She had known that it wouldn't be easy to work with him, but she had never expected things to be like this, to get things she had tried to protect herself from thrown back at her. But she should have known that it would end like this sooner or later when he had said _today _and that determined look had appeared in his eyes. Stopping in front of the driver's door she looked for the keys in her purse. Finding them she unlocked the car and stepped inside, throwing the purple purse and the black coat on the passenger seat. Megan slammed the door shut and took a deep breath. She started the car and drove out of the garage onto the streets she knew all too well.

It was raining heavily and lightning flew over the sky, now and then a loud clap of thunder broke the night's silence. As she drove, Megan was sure she exceeded the speed limit, but right now she just wanted to get home as soon as possible and lay down in her bed. She had been so close to give in, and she hated herself for almost doing so. She felt the anger boil within her, how could she be so weak? When she was around him it was like all her defenses disappeared.

The more she thought about it, the more she was convinced that it wasn't just Tommy that had made her react like she did; she had also contributed to it. A part of her had wanted something like this to happen since they started working together. That part of her wouldn't have backed down tonight. That part would have relied on emotions that lay buried deep within her, emotions she had promised herself to forget. She wouldn't have stopped it, she would have taken the step, and she wouldn't have hesitated. That was what scared her the most; knowing she wouldn't have the power to stop herself. She knew it was the truth, but it wasn't the truth Megan wanted. She wanted an assurance that it was nothing, that the emotions she had felt had just been imaginary.

Running a hand trough her red hair she exhaled deeply. All this was giving her a headache. A part of her had been willing to forgive him, a part of herself she didn't know existed. What if he tried to approach her again? The idea of losing control again scared her. What if she couldn't regain control the next time something like that happened?

Megan wanted to cut him out of her life so badly, but she couldn't just walk away from everything that reminded her of him. They worked together, it would be impossible to avoid him. He had infiltrated her life in all aspects, without her noticing it.

Parking the car Megan quickly grabbed her purse and the coat, running across the street to avoid the rain. In a matter of seconds she was sticking the key in the lock and opening the door to her home.

Closing the door behind her a sense of security washed over her. Leaning against it she took off her green heels. Slowly she tiptoed to the kitchen island. Putting down the purse and the coat she searched for her phone, taking out the contents and placing them in a heap. When she couldn't find the phone a series of curses left her lips.

"Great. I left it at work." She exclaimed. Leaving the purse and its contents on the island she crept over to the fridge. Searching for the bottle of whiskey she smiled when she took it out and placed it on the counter. Taking out a small glass she poured up the drink, knowing that she would need a nightcap. Megan placed back the whiskey and took the glass in her right hand as she walked to her bedroom. She continued to sneak over the floor, careful not to wake Lacey up but started to walk normally when she remembered that she was sleeping at a friend's house.

All she wanted to do now was to lie down in her bed and sleep, forget all about tonight and hope it was just a dream. With light steps she walked into her bedroom and placed the glass of whiskey on her nightstand. She quickly slipped out of her green blouse and black pants, and put on a plaid sleep shirt in satin.

Walking over to the window she looked out and saw that it was still raining heavily. Megan carefully opened the window to let in the sound of pattering raindrops. She pulled down the blinds but angled them so that she could still look outside. She stood by the window lost in thoughts but decided to move away when the cold air wrapped itself around her body.

The floor felt cold under her bare feet as she walked over to her bed. Sitting down on the beds right ride she reached for the glass on the nightstand and brought it to her lips. Taking a sip she closed her eyes, letting her body relax. She put the glass back on the nightstand and opened her eyes to look at the alarm clock. _1:30 am._ She exhaled frustrated, realizing that she wouldn't get much sleep tonight. She got more frustrated when she realized that it was his fault, if he hadn't showed up at her office she would have been home about an hour ago and she wouldn't be so angry at herself.

Tugging down the covers, Megan laid down on her back listening to the rain that fell. Slowly she closed her eyes not bothering to pull up the covers, but quickly opened her eyes again when a clap of thunder broke the steady sound of the raindrops pattering.

"Tomorrow" She whispered softly, not wanting the morning to come since it would mean that in a few hours she would have to see Tommy. His ice blue eyes with a soft gaze when he looked at her, his smile that lit up his face, the challenging and sometimes teasing tone he used when he spoke to her. She would have to talk to him. But she didn't want to. What was she supposed to say? She had no idea how to act around him.

Frankly she didn't want to be around him at all. Knowing that there was a risk that she would lose control again, she decided that the best thing to do maybe was just trying to avoid him, or at least anything that wasn't work related. Then maybe he would realize that she had made a mistake in her office and that she didn't want anything to do with him.

As her mind took her back to her office, she felt that _feeling_ in her stomach again. Megan couldn't quite put her finger on what it was, but she was sure she wasn't supposed to feel it. That almost bubbling and excited feeling that ran through her body when she remembered everything that had happened. His blue eyes, his smile, his hands around hers. No, that was just imagination; she tried to convince herself as she pushed away the feelings.

"I didn't feel anything." She whispered, her eyes closing slowly. "Absolutely nothing." She said in the same tone and let out a breath she didn't knew she had been holding, focusing on the darkness behind her eyelids, she drew a sigh of relief. Slowly her breathing became softer and her body relaxed.

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Constructive criticism and reviews are always welcome.

_**- Rae**_


	4. Tomorrow's here

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline

**A/N: **Thank you soooo much for your reviews, they make me really happy.

And once again thank you so much **niagaraweasel** for being such a wonderful beta.

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**Chapter 4: Tomorrow's here**

The next morning came too fast, faster than Megan had wished for. The sun shone through Megan's window, lighting up her face. As she opened her eyes she immediately squinted at the bright light. Rubbing her eyes Megan sat up in her bed and looked at the clock. _6 am. _A yawn escaped her when she looked around in her room with sleepy eyes. She crawled to the left side of the bed and swung her legs over the edge. She was just about to stand up when she realized that this was _tomorrow_, the tomorrow she hadn't wanted to arrive. The thought of it made a lump form in her stomach. Today she would have to meet Tommy. Letting out a small breath she forced herself to stand up.

"I _can_ do this." She said in a deep and dull voice as she walked to the kitchen and started to make coffee. All she wanted was to crawl back under the blankets and sleep through the entire day, but she knew she couldn't do that, she had to work. The sooner she solved the case the sooner she could go home and avoid any conversation with _him._

Images from her office filled her head, making her flinch slightly. Why was it so hard to forget about the whole thing? Turning back to the coffee maker she tried to force away the images of Tommy, but it seemed like the harder she tried to forget about him, the more she remembered. His ice blue eyes that had smiled at her last night, her hands in his, everything became clearer.

Letting out a deep breath Megan poured herself the coffee and took a sip. Feeling the warm liquid run down her throat she closed her eyes and thought about what she had concluded last night. She would keep her distance and not go into deep water by talking about anything that was personal and that hadn't anything to do with work. A little smile spread over her face. "I can do this." She said again, this time with a confident tone in her voice.

Seven hours later Megan was sitting in her office, she had been there since 7:15 am and had made a great progress in the case. When she had entered her office she had felt nervous, and the lump in her stomach had made itself felt again. Megan had felt like running away from the room, but had forced herself to stay; she had told herself she was just being silly. As soon as she had started going through the blood results again she had felt a calmness spread over her, it was nice to fall back on something she knew well, something that wouldn't make her doubt herself. The hours had passed and Tommy hadn't crossed her mind once.

Closing the file Megan leaned back in the chair, letting a breath escape her lips. Maybe it was time for a short break? She stood up, walking to the door with quick steps. Just as she was about to open it her phone started to ring, she walked back to her desk and answered without looking at the caller id.

"Megan Hunt."

"Megan, it's Tommy." As soon as she heard his voice it felt like all the calmness she had felt earlier left every cell of her body. Taking a small breath she started to pace around in circles, feeling waves of heat run through her body. Tommy was the last person she wanted to talk to right now, she had managed to take her thoughts off him almost all day and now they came crashing down again.

"Tommy." She said in what she thought was a calm voice, resisting the urge to hang up. "Why are you-" she started but cut herself off. "Something new about the case?" She asked instead, since that was a more appropriate question.

"Yeah, Adam talked to the neighbor again. Apparently he saw the victim argue with a man a few days ago. He didn't think of it at the time, but he called us today." Tommy said, taking a short pause before he continued. Megan could hear a faint sound of traffic in the background, making her wonder where he was. "He gave us a name. I just got the address a few minutes ago; I'll pick you up in five." He said quickly and hung up before Megan could answer. A shocked expression had spread over her face. She began to breathe faster when she realized she would have to face him, talk to him, and sit in the same car as him barely five minutes from now. The lump she had felt in her stomach this morning materialized again, making her more nervous than she already was. Everything that could go wrong filled her brain, scenario after scenario. What would happen if she lost control? They would be in a car alone. _Nobody_ would be there to interrupt them. A light knock on her door made her jump._ Have five minutes already passed? _She thought.

"You ready?" Tommy asked leaning against the door frame, a relaxed smile on his face.

Megan froze for a second when she heard his voice. _No_, she wanted to answer but bit back the word. Frantically she tried to find a solution to the problem, something that would prevent her from having to go with him. Taking a small breath she forced herself to remain calm.

As she turned around he saw hesitation flash over her face, but disappear and be replaced by coldness.

"I examined the body again." She blurted out, even if that wasn't the entire truth, she had examined the body yesterday, but saying so would buy her time to think. Walking back to her desk, she concluded that more distance between them was better for her. "I found some DNA under the fingernails. The lab is doing a search now." Megan continued, turning towards him, leaning against the desk, forcing a confident look on her face. Maybe there was a small chance she could wriggle out of this.

"That's good." Tommy said and took a step into the office, remembering last night, when he had done exactly the same thing. Looking at Megan he saw her tense up as he took another step into her office, her posture nervous. "Are you coming?" He asked and pointed at the door, suggesting that they should get going soon.

"No." Her answer made a small frown appear between his eyebrows. He searched for her eyes to get an explanation but she looked away. He had expected that the car ride to the suspect's house would be a perfect opportunity to talk, but his plan seemed to fall apart.

"Why?" Tommy asked, slipping a hand inside his black pants pocket, grabbing the car key, it felt cold against his warm palm.

"I have a lot to do here." She said curtly, hoping that he would leave. Tommy just kept looking at her, a doubting expression on his face.

"What is it that you have to do?" He said and walked to the center of the room, not looking away from her. Megan swallowed hard and forced herself to meet his gaze. His blue eyes had a questioningly look in them; one she didn't know how to answer. Deciding that more distance between them would make her think more clearly she moved around her desk and sat down in the chair.

"I have to do some more tests." She said after a while, starting to organize the papers on her desk. When Megan didn't heard any footsteps she looked up again. Tommy was still standing there looking at her.

He knew exactly what she was doing, this was Megan being professional, focusing on work. Nothing more nothing less. She was avoiding him, trying to come up with excuses.

"I think you should come with me." He said, not willing to let her get away so easily. He took out the keys and held them up in the air as if it would make her change her mind.

Megan looked from the keys in his hand to his ice blue eyes, considering if she should go with him. It was a suspect, maybe a new lead that could provide them with more information. But at the same time he was a cop, he would do just fine without her. And if he got some useful information, he could always call her, right?

"As I said, I have a few things I need to take care of here. But call if you need something." Megan said, knowing that he wouldn't find any counterarguments as to why she should go with him. She gave him a small smile and looked at the door, a hint for him to leave.

But Tommy didn't move; instead he took a step closer to her desk. He knew they needed to talk, so why not do it here? Taking a deep breath he said what was on his mind.

"Listen, about last night…" He started in a soft tone, knowing that he had to be careful if he wanted her to collaborate with him. "We both know that we need to talk about it."

Megan had feared she would have to take this conversation sooner or later, but she hadn't expected Tommy to bring it up now.

"No we don't." Giving him an irritated glare she continued. "_Last night _was just bad judgment." She said in a confident tone, the problem was that she didn't believe herself. Looking away from his gaze to the window she felt her heart pound in her chest. They both knew she was lying.

"That's a lie." Tommy concluded and moved towards the window, stopping in front of the place that her gaze rested, forcing her to look at him. "It was more than _bad judgment_, Megan. We both felt that there was something more."

Megan blinked a few times as she looked up at him, her mouth dropping in a frustrated grimace. "I didn't." she responded in a harsh voice, her hand running through her red hair.

"Yes, you did." Tommy said quickly, his voice unconsciously getting louder, as he felt the frustration build up within him. Megan gave him a skeptic glare. Feeling the need to explain, Tommy walked away from the window to stand in front of her desk again. "I saw it in your eyes. You felt the exact same thing as I did."

"That's wishful thinking from your side." Megan shoot back, her voice rising one octave, anger sweeping over her features. Clenching his hands, Tommy breathed out slightly, trying to control his temper. But the way Megan was denying everything frustrated him, and the look in her eyes only made it worse.

"I know what I saw." He said loudly, seeing her flinch slightly at the furious tone she hadn't expected him to use. "I saw the way you reacted, and you can't deny that you felt something." He continued, pointing an accusing finger at her, feeling the anger bubble within him.

Megan fell silent; she didn't know how to respond to that. He would be able to read her like an open book if she tried, which would only result in her feelings leaking out.

"Don't you have a _suspect_ to visit?" she said, her voice dripping with fury and dislike.

Even if Tommy wanted to stay and sort out things between them, he knew she was right.

"I'll go now." He said in a calmer tone and reluctantly backed away towards the door. "But this isn't over." He said as he closed the glass door behind him and shot her a determined look through the glass, seeing her look away.

After a few seconds Megan turned back to look at him through the glass walls. As he entered the elevator she felt relief and pride spread through her body. A content smile played on her lips. Things hadn't spun out of control and she had managed to get him to leave before she couldn't wriggle out of it all. At least she had taken a step in the right direction, the direction that lead away from him. Opening the file she had been reading the content smile stayed on her lips.

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Constructive criticism and reviews are always welcome.

**_- Rae_**


	5. Mother hen syndrome

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline

**A/N:** Thank you for your beautiful reviews, I can't describe how happy they make me!

And as always, thank you so much **niagaraweasel**.

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**Chapter 5: Mother hen syndrome**

The hours passed without Megan noticing it, she was deeply absorbed in the text lying on the desk in front of her, when a light knock she had learned to recognize broke the silence in the room, making her heart beat faster. She didn't need to look up to know who it was, he was the only one that knocked that way, two soft knocks followed by a louder one.

Her hazel eyes darted to the glass door, meeting Tommy's ice blue eyes. He smiled slightly seeing the surprised look on her face, making her look away from him.

"So, we got the suspect down at the station." He walked into her office, startled to see a look of fury on her features again. She was probably wondering why he was here. "I brought his file, thought you wanted to read it." He said, holding it up in the air for her to see and stopped in front of her desk. Placing the pale file on her desk, Megan's eyes focused on it.

"Okay." She said as she opened it and eyed the text. "Did he-" she started and looked up to meet his gaze, but stopped mid sentence. "What happened?" She said in a shaky voice, her eyes sweeping over the small cuts on his face. One corner of his mouth was slightly swollen, and if she looked closely she could see a few small darker spots on his dark blue shirt, which she guessed were blood. Looking down at his knuckles, she noticed they had a light red-purple tone. A wave of concern washed over her.

"What? This?" He said in a relaxed voice, and pointed at his face. "It's just a couple of scratches."

"That is not just a couple of scratches, Tommy!" Megan said and stood up from her chair, her eyes narrowing his. The fury she had felt, now forgotten. How could he be so nonchalant about this? But she knew the answer; for him anything that didn't involve missing limbs or broken bones wasn't something to worry about.

"Relax Megan; they will heal on their own." He responded, trying to calm her down, but it didn't work. The concerned look in her eyes remained there.

"Let me look at it!" She blurted out as she walked around her desk to stand in front of him, Megan's eyes scanning his body to see if there were more injuries.

"I'm fine, really." Tommy said with a smile, making her look up at him with a light frown on her face.

"Sit down and let me look at it." She commanded and pointed at the couch not breaking eye contact, but he didn't move. She gave him a stern look and pursed her lips. Exhaling Tommy looked towards the couch and back at her again.

"Look, it's not like any of my limbs are missing, nothing is broken, and I can still move." He said and waved at her with both hands. "See? I told you I'm fi-"

"Shut up and sit down." She said sternly, her voice making it clear that she wouldn't take a _no_ for an answer. Exhaling again he walked to the couch and sat down, he knew better than not obey.

Sitting down next to him Megan placed a light hand on his cheek, turning his face towards the light. The touch made a warm feeling spread through his body. As a rule he didn't like to be taken care of, but if it was Megan, he really didn't mind, he enjoyed it.

Her fingers slowly brushed over his face, examining the cuts and the swollen area at the corner of his mouth.

Carefully she pressed her fingers against the reddish area, making him flinch slightly. It made her eyes shoot to his in concern. "Sorry." She said in a soft voice, making the corner of his mouth twitch, holding back a smile.

"We should get some ice to that." Megan said as she looked at the swollen area. It had a reddish color, but she knew it would turn a light tone of purple soon. Her thumb ran over his jaw line, making satisfaction appear in his eyes. She was always so gentle when it came to taking care of others.

But all too soon she pulled away, and he couldn't help the disappointed feeling that spread trough him.

"So what do you think doc?" He asked in a teasing tone. "You need to call the ambulance and send me into surgery?" He joked raising his brows.

Megan couldn't resist rolling her eyes at him but greeted him with an amused smile.

"No, and you won't need CPR either." She responded in the same tone he had used, making him smile. "I think you should be more careful, can't have you end up hurt." She said, knowing that he wouldn't agree with her about being hurt.

"I'm not. As I said, it's just a couple of scratches." Tommy responded quickly.

"You still need to get them cleaned up." Megan pointed out as she stood up from the couch, receiving a questioningly look from him.

"Is that really necessary?" He asked as he watched her walk towards the open glass door.

"Yes." She said and looked over her shoulder at him. "I'll be back in a second." He watched her walk out of the office and disappear around a corner.

Tommy placed his left arm on the backrest and glanced out the window behind him. It was still bright outside, but the darkness had slowly started to replace the clear sky. A few clouds drifted by in the light breeze. His thoughts wandered to Megan, he hadn't expected to end up on her couch with her taking care of his cuts and bruises. He had expected her to be cold after their little argument a few hours ago, but instead she had let her walls fall down and allowed her concern to show. He smiled when he remembered the sensation of her light fingers brushing over his skin; it was something he had missed.

He had thought about not going back here, she wouldn't like it and definitely ask him to leave, but then he had changed his mind when he saw the suspect's file. It was a perfect excuse as to why he would return, and now he was glad he had decided to do it.

The sound of clicking heels made him look back to the open door. Megan caught his eye as she approached her office, a metal bowl filled with water he guessed, with a white towel hanging out of it, an ice pack and a white bottle with the text _soap_ on it, in her hands.

Closing the door behind her with her foot, Megan placed the white bottle on her desk and moved to the couch. Sitting down next to him she placed the bowl on the glass table beside the couch and handed him the ice pack, which he placed on the corner of his mouth. She wrung out the towel and moved closer to him, to get better access, their thighs brushing against each other. Her first reaction to the contact was to move away, but something stopped her from doing so, instead she kept still, letting the warm feeling linger.

Having her so close, he could smell her perfume, a fresh and sweet smell of flowers, it made him smile slightly. Flowers always made him think of Megan. She noticed his small smile and returned it, her roseberry lips arching in a gracious gesture. He loved when she smiled that way, with both her eyes and lips, it made chills run down his spine.

As Megan concentrated on the cuts again she carefully pressed the wet towel against a cut that was parallel with his right eyebrow, making small circular movements to clean it.

Megan pulled away slightly and dipped the towel in the lukewarm water, before focusing on another cut.

"Aren't you going to use any disinfectants?" Tommy asked after a little while. Megan smiled at him, her eyes still locked on the cut.

"No, I know you don't like that…" She said sweetly in a calm voice. "Mild soap works just as well." Tommy felt surprised by the fact that she had remembered that detail about him.

Tommy didn't respond instead he kept his eyes on hers; there was a warmth in her gaze he hadn't seen in a while. Feeling his eyes on her, Megan's movements stopped as she looked into his ice blue eyes again. Her lips parted slightly, like she was about to say something, but she closed them again and broke the eye contact.

But he didn't look away like she had expected; it made a light crimson color spread over her cheeks. He studied her beautiful features, the sparkling hazel gaze that rested on his shoulder, the roseberry lips that could create the most beautiful smiles and form the most amazing sentences. He noticed the small blush on her cheeks and couldn't help the smile that played on his lips.

Taking a small breath, Megan tried to focus on the cuts again. She once again dipped the towel in the soap water and leaned closer to clean up the cut. Hesitantly she raised her hand and softly placed it on his chest for support. The touch made a low painful sound escape him, which made her pull away; afraid that she had somehow hurt him.

"Does it hurt?" She asked and pressed her hand against his chest again.

"It's fine." Tommy responded, trying to get her to move her hand away.

"Don't lie to me." Megan said and gave him a concerned look. Slowly she slid his black jacket off his shoulders, excepting him to stop her but he didn't.

Megan started to unbutton his shirt and looked up at him to see if there was any sign that told her not to, but she didn't see one.

Her fingertips that carefully brushed over his skin made chills run down his spine, and excitement fill him.

As she unbuttoned the first three buttons and pushed the dark blue fabric aside, Megan saw a purple bruise on his upper chest. Her fingers lightly slid over his chest, and unbuttoned another button, as her eyes slowly wandered down his chest. Memories filling her brain as she drew small circles over his hot flesh.

"Megan?" Tommy said slowly in a low voice, getting her attention. She looked up at him, her face barely an inch away from his. He reached out to brush away a flaming red curl from her face, his hand brushing lightly against her cheek. Tracing her jaw line with his thumb, he let his hand drop to his thigh when it reached her chin. Tommy could feel her soft breaths against his face. Her hazel eyes searched for his, the look in her eyes mirrored his. But then he saw her change before his eyes, the look now gone and replaced by confusion.

Megan blinked and pulled away, quickly jumping to her feet, the quick movement almost making her lose her balance.

"Megan…" Tommy said as he watched her throw down her things in her black bag. She didn't look up, just closed her eyes for a second before she grabbed her jacket and rushed towards the door. But before she could open it Tommy had stood up and grabbed the doorknob. Realizing that she couldn't leave she looked up at him.

"_Open_ the door." She said in a harsh voice filled with fury. Her hazel eyes narrowed, anger sweeping over them. But he didn't obey, instead he returned her glare.

"This is exactly what I mean." He said and stepped closer to her, making her take a step back. "You can get so very close one second, and the next? You are practically running away." He said in a frustrated voice, a light frown on his face as he looked for some kind of sign that told him she would open up again, but he didn't see one. Just the hard look in her eyes that told him she had raised her walls again. Megan opened her mouth to respond, but he hushed her and continued. "And then it's like _nothing_ happened."

Megan just looked at him. He could see that she was trying not to lose her patience, her eyes trying to mask her emotions. But he was still able to read them. She was trying to replace the fury and knowledge in her eyes with emptiness. Tommy knew she was angry at herself for letting this happen, and at him for being right about everything, because she knew it was true.

Slowly he released his grip on the doorknob, and as soon as he did, she flung open the door and rushed towards the elevators. He watched her wait a few seconds before deciding to take the stairs instead, the sound of clicking heels the only thing he could hear before she disappeared.

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**_- Rae_**


	6. Closet confrontation

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except the storyline.

**A/N:** Thank you so much dear readers for your beautiful reviews! They always make me smile and encourage me to write.

(And I know it's not a closet, but it's quite similar to one...)

**niagaraweasel**, thank you for everything.

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**Chapter 6: Closet confrontation**

The sun had climbed up in the sky and shone through the windows to Megan's office. Tommy slowly opened the door and looked around in the empty room. There were no signs that indicated that she had been here this morning, and it made him worried.

He had tried to call Megan three times, but she hadn't answered. His first thought had been that she was just ignoring him, but as time passed he had started to get nervous and driven to her office.

Sighing he looked down at his phone again. No missed calls or texts. It was 8:39; she should have been here about an hour ago. His eyes locked on the metal bowl and the towel on the glass table beside the couch. Instantly his brain started to replay the scene for him again. The worried look in her hazel eyes, the sensation of her fingertips against his skin, the softness of her cheek and jawbone, almost like silk and then the furious look in her eyes when she had stormed away.

Tommy sighed and pushed away the images. Looking out the window he swept his eyes over the buildings, wondering where she could be. _Five more minutes, and then I'll drive to her condo. _He glanced down at his phone again and a sigh escaped him when he saw that she still hadn't called him back. He watched the clock on the office wall tick away the minutes as he sat down on the couch.

"That's it." Tommy said when five minutes had passed and stood up, walking out of the office. As he was closing the office door behind him, he heard the familiar clicking of heels against the floor. He looked up, his eyes searching for her. Relief filled him when he spotted Megan, walking towards him.

She was digging in her purse for something but when she looked up and met his gaze she stopped mid step, the sound of her heels against the floor stopping abruptly. She looked straight at him, before her eyes darted to her office door. Letting out a small breath she started to walk again. Tommy smiled at her but didn't receive a smile back, just a quick empty gaze in his direction.

"Don't you answer your phone anymore?" He asked when she was in hearing distance, opening the glass door for her.

"I didn't have time." She said, brushing past him in the doorway. Unintentionally a small breath escaped her when she felt his chest against her side, her heart starting to beat faster. Megan tried to calm herself down as she unzipped her black jacket and moved towards the coat-hanger. Tommy closed the door behind him, watching her walk to her desk. She froze for a second when she saw the bottle of soap, her gaze moving towards the glass table by the couch. He could see her breath hitching in her throat before she placed the purse on her desk.

"It could have been something important." Tommy said as he walked closer to the desk.

"But it wasn't." Megan responded as she took up the file lying on her desk. She expected it to be the suspects file but when she opened it she saw that it was the DNA results. Her mind started to work at full speed when she saw who it belonged to. It couldn't be right, could it?

Tommy's voice cut through her thoughts, making her turn around and look at him with a confused expression.

"What?" she asked, her gaze moving to the file in her hands again.

"I said, I have to be able to reach you." Tommy responded as she put the file back down on the desk, turning her attention towards him.

"You aren't the only one with a phone. If it was something important, I'm sure someone else could have called too." Megan said, her eyes narrowing slightly before she side stepped him and headed towards the door. Tommy watched her as she left her office. She was wearing a dress he hadn't seen on her before, a deep shade of sapphire, stopping right above her knees. He liked it when she wore sapphire blue; it accentuated her beautiful hazel eyes, flaming red hair and soft skin. Walking out of her office he saw her round a corner as he decided to follow her.

Megan hurried down a corridor, her mind focusing on the DNA results again, hoping to find Curtis or Ethan. There had to be a mistake.

A yawn escaped her and she realized how tired she was. Megan hadn't been able to sleep as much as she had wished for last night. The feeling of his hand brushing away a strand of hair and his thumb tracing her jaw line had lingered in her memory almost all night. How warm his skin had felt. Sighing, Megan tilted her head back looking up at the ceiling, her hands on her neck as she walked, closing her eyes for a second. Was it really necessary for him to show up at her office _every single_ day?

"Megan." she heard a familiar voice say and when she turned around he was standing right in front of her. She took the time to fully look at him. The corner of his mouth had as she anticipated turned a light shade of purple and the skin around some of his cuts had a reddish tone.

"Yes?" she asked after a while focusing her gaze on his eyes, remembering the look that had been there yesterday.

"I wanted to talk to you." He said, taking a small step closer towards her.

"About the case?" Megan asked, but she already knew the answer. If it had something to do with the case, he would get straight to the point.

"No-"

"I don't have time for this Tommy." She said in a hard voice. "Don't you have a job to do?"

"Yes-" Tommy started but she cut him off.

"Why don't you start doing it then, and let me do mine?" With that she turned around and started to walk again. She heard him call after her but didn't turn around, she couldn't do that since it meant talking about what she absolutely didn't want to talk about.

Tommy sighed and walked after her, calling her name again, but she just kept on going. Speeding up his pace he caught up with her and grabbed her shoulder, turning her around. He could see the anger and frustration flash in her eyes.

"Megan, we need to sort things out." He said as calmly as he could, forcing a relaxed look on his face.

"There's nothing we need to sort out." Megan responded, the irritation in her voice impossible to miss.

"Why do you keep doing that?" He said glaring at her, feeling the frustration grow.

"Doing what?" She asked placing her hands on her hips, her eyes narrowing again.

"Denying everything and running away all the time." Tommy responded through gritted teeth, trying to stay calm.

"If you haven't noticed we have responsibilities, called jobs that we need to do. And right now I don't have time for _this_." Megan responded and motioned between them. "I have a case to focus on."

"_This_-" Tommy repeated in the same tone she had used and motioned between them."-is affecting our job!" He exclaimed, getting more frustrated by the minute.

"Whose fault is that?" She asked, her index finger pushing hard against his chest accusingly. "You should have thought of this before you made your move!" Megan fired at him, her finger still pressing against his chest.

"No. Don't put this all on me! You made your decisions too!" Tommy responded his voice getting louder with every word.

"Which where mistakes!" Megan said as she turned to leave. But before she could even take a step Tommy quickly grasped her wrist, turning her back towards him. Megan gave him a look that easily could have killed someone.

"We both know that isn't true!" He said, his eyes locking with hers, not releasing his grip around her wrist.

"They were mistakes. This doesn't mean anything!" Megan said in a loud voice, her eyes trying to read his emotions. His gaze showed the exact same thing as hers, frustration.

The sound of footsteps made Tommy break eye contact. They hadn't noticed a few passers-by which were now giving them curious glances. Spotting a door a few feet away he dragged Megan towards it. She immediately tried to wriggle out of his grip.

"What are you doing?" she asked in a harsh voice. Tommy stopped and turned to look at her.

"We are drawing attention to us." He said nodding at the passers-by. Megan looked towards the door and then at the people that were walking by, throwing glances at them. She let out an irritated breath and headed towards the door. She surely didn't want the whole place to hear them nor find out anything about this discussion. Megan opened the door and turned towards him. Tommy smiled slightly and pushed her inside as he released her wrist, making a surprised breath escape her. He closed the door behind him and searched for the light switch.

"Tommy, turn the lights on." Megan said, trying to distinguish where they were. Tommy groaned and turned towards her.

"I can't find the switch." He said frustrated.

"You can't find nor do anything, but it's no surprise." Megan responded mockingly as she took a step towards him, her hands reaching out to locate the wall. Her fingers brushed against fabric and she quickly drew her hand away. Tommy couldn't help the small smile that spread over his face as he reached out towards her. He grabbed her shoulder and pulled her towards him. He could hear her stumbling steps in the dark and pushed her towards the wall.

"That's the wall." He said releasing her.

"I could have found it myself." Megan muttered under her breath.

"Sure you could." Tommy said in a skeptical tone. Megan ignored his comment and swept her hands over the wall. When she felt the switch a triumphant smile spread over her face as she turned the lights on. "If I want something done when you're around I have to do it myself" Megan said. The bright light made her squint. Turning away from the wall she let out a choked breath when she almost walked into Tommy, she hadn't realized that he was standing so close. Taking a step back she looked around in the room, an archive room. Looking back at Tommy she waited for him to say something.

"I'm tired of not knowing, Megan…" Tommy said after a while, his voice calmer than before.

"I don't-" she started but cut herself off. Megan looked down at her feet before she looked up again. He still had the same unknowing expression; it made the frustration start to bubble within her again. "What do you want?" She asked, her voice harder then she had indented it to be.

"Answers." Tommy said and slid one hand in his pants pocket.

"That I don't have!" Megan exclaimed and reached for the doorknob, but before she had even locked her hand around it he had pulled her away from it, spinning her around so that he was standing between her and the door. Megan tried to sidestep him, but he wouldn't move out of the way, making the frustration grow. "_Move_ out of the way Tommy." She said in a stern voice looking up at him.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked, still not moving.

"Why are _you_ doing this?!" She said and looked around in the room. "I don't know what you expect to get out of this." She said and made a sweeping gesture with her arm in the air.

"You know what I want. I want you to answer me honestly." Tommy said, watching her cross her arms.

"Oh, I see this is an interrogation?" Megan responded mockingly.

"No, this isn't-"

"Yes it is, shouldn't we be at the police department if you want to ask me things?" She asked in a sarcastic voice.

"That's not what I want." He said and ran a hand trough his hair.

"What do you want then?"

"The truth." He exclaimed loudly. Megan looked at him, and for a second he saw fear and doubt flash over her eyes before she looked away from his eyes towards the door.

"I'm done here." She said in a tired and cold tone.

"No, We-" He said and motioned between them "-aren't done here." As he took a step towards her, he searched for her hazel eyes. "You can't keep running away all the time Megan! That won't lead anywhere." He continued.

"I don't want this to lead anywhere!" Megan responded quickly, pursing her roseberry lips.

"Damn it Megan! Why can't you at least try?"

"What am I supposed to say then? Tell me!"

"Start by not denying that you feel something." He said, jaw clenched, voice low.

"Open the door." Megan said, her voice trembling slightly as she tried to push past him.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you don't feel anything and I promise I'll drop it." As soon as the words left his mouth her eyes shot to his. He could see that she was considering his offer.

"I don't feel anything!" Megan said in the most convincing voice she had.

"You know I don't like when people lie right to my face, Megan. And right now, you're lying." Tommy stated, watching her hazel eyes widen slightly.

"I'm not lying!" Megan responded in a loud voice.

"Convince me, make me believe you." Tommy said calmly.

"I don't feel anything…" Megan repeated, her voice softer this time.

Megan waited for him to say something but he didn't made a sound, just gave her an unconvinced look.

"I don't… feel anything." She said, the words barely a whisper. "I don't…" she started but left the sentence hanging in the air.

Involuntarily she took a small step closer towards him, feeling his breath against her skin. Her hand slid up his chest, feeling his heart beat. She leaned closer, her breath catching in her throat. Looking him in the eyes she let her lips brush against his, both of them feeling a tingling. As he leaned closer responding to the kiss, she closed her eyes. He placed a hand on the back of her head, tousling her red hair. She pressed closer to him, remembering the feeling of his lips against hers. It felt like no time had passed since their last kiss. Tommy lightly placed his hand on her shoulder, sliding it down to her waist.

Suddenly Megan pulled away and took a step back. Her hazel eyes met his ice blue ones, disbelief in her gaze. Shaking her head slightly, her mouth opening like she wanted to say something but no words left her roseberry lips. Before Tommy could utter a word, her palm slapped against his cheek. He heard the sound of clicking heels, the door flinging open and shut again with a slam.

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**_- Rae_**


	7. The right thing

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing except this storyline

**A/N:** I'm really sorry for not posting anything in over a month, but I've been on my summer vacation and I haven't had time to write.

And, thank you for the beautiful reviews, they always make me smile.

**niagaraweasel**, thank you for everything.

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**Chapter 7: The right thing**

A split second, it had been a split second when Megan stopped in her tracks. A split second between taking a step and moving forward. A moment of doubt, and in that little moment she had considered opening that door again. It hadn't even been a second, but it had been there and that was enough to scare her.

She hadn't intended to stop, when she had pushed open the door and closed it behind her she hadn't doubted. But yet she had frozen mid step for a fraction of a second, before walking away as fast as possible without running. And she knew very well that a little moment of doubt like that could easily become several seconds next time, and maybe that would be enough for her to throw logic out the window. That feeling of doubt had hunted her almost all day, and six hours later she still hadn't been able to shake it off.

Megan walked into her office and closed the door behind her. She had run out of things to do and now she was forced to think about _it_, knowing that her mind wouldn't let her forget. Unconsciously her fingers brushed over her lips softly, the feeling of his lips against hers still lingering in her memory. At first she had felt a small tingle in her body; shivers had run down her spine, before a feeling of safety and desire had filled her. It had felt like coming home.

Pushing away the thoughts Megan started to pace the room. She hadn't expected to feel the way she had felt, and that was another thing that scared her. How could her head tell her one thing and her feelings another? She felt torn and completely lost.

She was sure she had never felt this way ever before, and the feeling wasn't pleasant. And of course all this was because of Tommy. He seemed to leave a total mess behind whatever he did. Not to talk about how stupid she felt for letting temptation get the better of her. But then again, it wasn't just temptation, it was so much more and she had no idea what to do to make it stop.

Sitting down on the couch she placed her elbows on her knees, dropping her head to cover her eyes with her palms. A faint scent of aftershave filled her nose, making her jump. She sniffed and there the unmistakable scent was. Taking strands of her hair and smelling them, she was almost sure she could smell his aftershave. Tugging her hair behind her ears she suddenly felt ridiculous. It was impossible that she could smell his aftershave; it was probably just in her mind, her at the moment very, very disorientated mind.

She honestly didn't know _anybody_ that could get under her skin like he did, somebody that knew exactly which buttons to push to get to her. He knew her far too well for her liking. But she knew him far too well too, and she knew that if she put her mind into it and focused she would be able to predict him. Maybe even his _every_ move if she managed to concentrate. The problem was that her brain seemed to shut down before she could actually do some predicting when he was around. And that led to some very stupid decisions, like this morning when she had kissed him. Images started to flood her mind, making her take a deep breath to push them away. Right now she needed to think straight, no more clouded thoughts here.

She started to pace around in her office again, biting her lower lip as she tried to come up with a plan how she would make him understand that she didn't want this. Pursing her lips and looking out the window she tried to gather her thoughts. One thing she knew for sure was that she had to stop this, their relationship needed to just be professional. At least she knew that much and it was a start. Why was this so difficult?

Sighing she moved to her desk and sat down on the chair. She had to start taking control over things, and pronto. It wasn't right, things weren't supposed to be this way. And the only way to sort things out was to talk with him. Frustration hit her immediately after the realization. Talking with him wouldn't be that easy, he was stubborn and wouldn't listen until he got his point across. But talking was the only alternative as how to solve this.

Her fingers curled against her palms a few times before she gathered enough courage to grab her phone to send him a text. Quickly she typed down the words in her head before she regretted it. Pressing send, Megan exhaled slightly, putting back the phone on her desk. She leaned back in the chair, twirling a strand of hair with her fingers while she kept her eyes locked on the phone, waiting for his reply. It felt like hours before the phone's screen lit up, but she was sure it was just a matter of seconds. Snatching it from the desk she opened the text and felt the lump in her stomach materialize again. Nodding her head slightly she put the phone back down on the desk. Okay, this was good news; she was one step closer to solving this mess.

Megan stood up and gathered her things before she left her office, feeling more nervous than she could ever remember feeling in her whole life.

... ... ...

Tommy opened the wooden door and glanced up at the welcome sign above it. Instantly the scent of food hit him. He looked around in the small restaurant, searching for her red vibrant hair. He spotted her sitting at a booth and made his way over to her. She held a glass of water in her hand, slowly tracing the rim with her forefinger as she stared absentmindedly down at the dark wooden table.

She had changed her clothes he noted. The sapphire dress had been replaced by black pants and a purple blouse.

"Hey."He greeted as he sat down in front of her, making her jump slightly at the sound of his voice. Her gaze immediately shot up to his eyes. The green in her eyes seemed to have faded away and the brown stood out more. He wondered if it had anything to do with the color of her blouse, or if she was tired.

"Hey." She responded, biting her lips, a sign that she was nervous. He hadn't seen her do that since NY and it worried him. Unspoken questions filled the air and Megan smiled slightly to reassure him that everything was okay.

The small smile brought his gaze to her lips and he soon found himself staring at them, remembering how they had felt against his this morning.

"So…" Tommy said looking up to her eyes again. "Ever been here before?" he asked, a little smile playing on his lips.

"No." Was her response. She glanced down at the menu and back at him, taking a shallow breath. Her eyes locked with his, the blue depths looking straight back at her. Megan felt the intensity in the air and had trouble bringing herself to speak.

"I can't do this." Megan said, trying to avoid his gaze, but couldn't break eye contact.

"Do what? We can eat somewhere else if you want." He suggested, but saw the look on her face and immediately knew she wasn't talking about food.

"No, I- it's not the food." Her hands cupped the glass in front of her, trying to gather courage. "I wanted to talk about us." She breathed out, an exhausted look flashing over her features. He silently waited for her to continue, watching her every move. "This, this-it won't work, Tommy." She finally said feeling relieved and proud that she had managed to say it. Megan looked deeply into his eyes, waiting for an answer, her nails tapping the glass unconsciously, another nervous habit.

Tommy sighed and ran a hand through his hair before he spoke.

"Why can't we give it another try?" He asked, his ice blue eyes never leaving hers. She inhaled lightly and seemed to tense up.

"It didn't work out the first time, why would it this time?" She said in a calm tone as she relaxed again.

"Things are different now, Megan." He leaned over the table, reaching for her hands, making the tapping stop. She looked down at the glass; her hands still cupping it tightly, but eventually the grip softened and he put both her hands between his, noticing how cold they felt against his palms. The familiar touch sent a jolt through her body, much like she had felt when they had kissed.

"Megan…" He said softly, making her look up. "You can't keep living in the past, people change." She flinched slightly at his words, withdrawing her hands from him back to the glass quickly, as if she had burned herself.

"Maybe they do…" She said after a while, making a small feeling of hope light up within him. "But when the trust that once was is broken, it's hard to fix it again." She finished. "And… I don't trust you in that way anymore, Tommy." He could have sworn he felt his heart break in that exact moment, a devastating feeling washing over him.

"I-_we_ can change that."

She smiled sadly at him, how could he still fight so hard when he knew the battle was already lost? She wouldn't change her mind about this.

"You can't just snap your fingers and fix it, Tommy." Her nails started to tap the glass again, as she crossed her legs under the table, accidentally brushing against his calf, a shot of electricity running through her body at the contact.

Tommy opened his mouth to say something but she cut him off before he could speak.

"Some things are better left as they are." Megan said, hoping that her answer would be enough to make him realize that she didn't want anything to do with him anymore.

"You don't know that." He said. A small sigh escaped her. Sometimes he could be so damn stubborn. "You once said that the biggest risk is not to take any risks. So I'm asking you now, take a risk." She really hated when he used her own words against her because it wasn't that easy to wriggle out of it.

"I can't do that anymore, I have Lacey now." She decided was the best answer.

"I'm not asking you to choose between her and me, Megan." Tommy responded as she took a sip of her water. "I'm asking to be a part of your life again." She put down the glass and swallowed. She was about to say something when a waitress appeared and cut her short.

"Are you ready to order?" She asked with a heavy French accent. Tommy smiled up at her.

"Not yet, thanks." The waitress smiled back before she moved to another table.

Tommy focused on Megan again. Her eyes rested on the glass again, a confused expression in them, she didn't know what to say.

She breathed out before she spoke. "I realized that I don't want this." Megan said when she saw his inquiring glance, he hadn't asked but she knew he wanted an answer.

"It didn't seem that way this morning." Tommy responded and leaned back in.

She shot him a glare, she had desperately tried to push the events of the morning out of her mind and now he was bringing them up again. She knew he waited for an answer, but she wasn't planning on giving him one.

"Why?" He finally said, breaking the silence. He watched a desperate look flash in her eyes before she looked away from him. She placed her elbow on the table, carefully leaning her head against her hand.

"It's for the best." Megan said slowly as she focused her gaze on him again. His eyes swept over her face, searching for a sign that told him she was lying.

"That isn't an answer." He said.

"It's a reason." Was her response. Megan waited for his answer, knowing that he was running out of things to say by the look in his eyes.

"A reason isn't enough."

Looking at him made her think of how much time she had spent with him. He knew so much about her, and she knew a lot about him too. He had always felt like home to her

"What we had, Tommy…" She started off slowly in a soft voice, choosing her words carefully. "- happened years ago, and we, I'm in another part of my life now." Finishing the sentence Megan looked up at him. His blue eyes had a hurt expression in them, and something she hadn't seen in them before. She couldn't bear to see the look in his eye so she turned her head away.

"You know what? You're right." Of all the things he could have said, that was the least expected one.

"I'm what?" She asked, her head snapping back to look at him, surprise in her voice. She needed to hear the words again to make sure she hadn't imagined it.

"You're right. This won't work until you make a decision, and make up your mind one way or another."

Every coherent sentence and thought seemed to have disappeared from her head, so she sat silently, staring at him. Realizing that she was at a loss for words, Tommy stood up. She watched him walk away and with every step he took it felt like her heart was being ripped into pieces. She knew this had been the right thing to do, but she couldn't shake the familiar feeling of her heart breaking. With every step he took she felt like calling his name and running out into the street after him, but forced herself not to. She knew that if she did follow him, or even took a step in his direction, all her control would slip between her fingers like sand. So she just sat there glancing down at her hands, telling herself she had done the right thing.

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I hope you liked it and that it makes up for my absence.

I'm not so sure when the next chapter will be up, but it will at some point, so this isn't the end.

_**- Rae**_


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